Seen Better.

Yeah it's there... but it's really bleak and unoriginal. There are better versions of this, plus a million more bad ones.
Maybe if you add some colour aswell. It kept me interested for about two minutes.

Not Bad!

This is pretty good and I like the singing... but I think that it's just a bit bleak at times. Gets better towards the end though [:
Also if your dual - layering a voice, I think having them panned so far apart has ruined the effect a bit perhaps?
It just seems to be a bit apart.